Why students of certain age tend to remain silent, shy and introvert ?

 

Ø Most of the children remain extrovert and could talk to anyone without feeling hesitated about anything. Some of them could maintain the same habit while growing up and won’t face any problem when they enter into their adolescence and adulthood. They will even develop their advanced speaking skills and tend to make very less mistakes while talking to anyone.

 But the problem comes with introverts and shy kids who don’t even know how to start a conversation and later on they will face a lot of problems while talking with friends or relatives. They also face problems while expressing their views and ideas.

 

Let’s come over my own experiences:

I had faced such problem when I was at the beginning of my grade 9. Until grade 8, I used to have a lot of conversations with my family members and relatives. I used to talk with anyone or let’s say like I could answer to anyone’s basic questions or I could give my reasons/ideas to their questions without getting stuck at any phrase. I used to answer my ideas to their questions very smoothly. But when the academic session of grade 9 started moving ahead, I developed the habit of introvert. It’s like that I was slowly cutting off the communication skill and progressed the habit of remaining silent. Whenever I used to get any questions, I don’t answer them because I thought they were not much important to answer to. Similarly, when days passed, I started to remain silent. I couldn’t express my needs very easily because I felt it would be odd and I became shy eventually. This is not the real me that used to be when I was till grade 8. The problem even started to grow when I reached my high school. I couldn’t discuss the best high school with my own parents because of awkwardness I developed during 9^th and 10^th.

At the high school, I decided to develop my speaking skills and become expert in verbal communication. I started to speak to the teachers and other colleagues. I started to notice that I was making a lot of mistakes while speaking. Similarly, I couldn’t express my ideas very well.

 

This was the most notable weakness that I got during those days.

Ø If someone used to ask me questions or anything or if there were some gatherings of relatives and they used to discuss over some interesting topics and since I had decided to be an expert in speaking with people, I used to think some reasons or ideas in my mind and try to elaborate it to the people present over there. Whenever I begin to elaborate my views, I couldn’t express it very fluently or clearly or smoothly. I used to get stuck at many words or lines while speaking. Similarly, I used to be nervous while talking and couldn’t speak without getting hesitated.

Likewise, whenever someone would criticize over my opinions or views, then I used to feel like that nobody will understand my ideas and get demotivated to speak. This used to lower my confident to speak or express my opinions among people. I used to feel like I will never speak in front of people again.

 

So, these kinds of things used to resist my confident level to speak up.

 

 

I used to think that this is only my problem and I couldn’t speak properly because I was again a problem. One day I found that another person who is around the same level when I stopped speaking, was facing the same problem. I started to find causes of this problem.

 

 

And I found the following causes:

Ø When I was till grade 8, I used to have less academic pressures. I used to have less assignments and other academic stuffs to complete. I used to go out and play different sports with my friends. I used to have a lot of spare time to spend. Similarly, I used to have a very good conversation skills with everyone. But there came the turning point. When I reached grade 9, I got a completely different academic sessions and classes. I got completely new teachers and the study courses got vague. At first, I used to have normal days like that during grade 8. But when time started to accelerate then I got problems with my studies. I used to get more assignment works. I literally used to wake up until 12:00 am to complete my assignment works. The daily routine got changed. There used to be extra classes beginning from early morning and another extra class till late evening. I used to came home tired and had to start doing the assignment works right immediately after eating some food. This became the daily routine and I hardly got time to speak with my parents. Eventually, this schedule developed the feeling of shyness and introvert in me.

 

Ø Another factor is the technology.

When I used to get home, then even at that little spare time, I used to get involved in mobile or laptops. The online social media used to cover my time and again the time to develop conversation skill would left unchecked.

 

Now a days, even little kids have this problem regarding the addiction on social media. My relative’s kids at younger age don’t even eat without watching videos on Youtube. The usage of social media works like taking the drugs on frequent basis. Social media usages and even touching of mobile phones generate dopamine; a hormone that is secreted while being happy or getting pleasures. So, kids, adults and even old aged people get addicted to the mobile phones. This demolishes the practical habit of speaking verbally.

 

When old aged people get addicted to mobile phones then what will they teach to younger generation and what will younger generation learn when they themselves are addicted to mobile phones and social media too. Small kids at family functions and gatherings ask their parents for mobile phones and when they don’t get it then they become angry and sad. And when they get it then they sit down at one corner and start to use mobile phones and don’t care about any other people in that gatherings. This habit also didn’t contributed much for the development of communication skill.

 

I had visited my relative’s home last week. There were other relatives too. Probably, 9-10 members and we had met after a long time. Now, the interesting thing that I could observe over there was that every member was busy watching their mobile phones. This became the social gatherings now a days. It’s like suppressing the habit of practical verbal communication.

 

So, the above mentioned two factors are seem to be the main reason why today’s generation is lacking communication skills. When a child spends maximum time only in school and social media then he/she wouldn’t get perfect on communication skills.